Hail to the Chief... Chief Mountain!

 Chief Mountain: Elevation 11,709 ft. Round trip... around 2.5 or 3 miles. This was our first mountain upon arriving in the Denver area this past 4th of July weekend. We had been in the mountains for less than 24 hours and needed to gain some elevation for our big 14,000 ft. mountains Dylan and I had planned for Saturday. Friday morning found us starting out bright and early on the trail, praying we adjusted well to the altitude and had good weather for the hike and the view from the top. 

As you can see, weather was gorgeous! The hike was nice and easy. A great hike for beginners. It was perfect for Dylan and I to get our "feet wet" the day before the big ones. Chief Mountain is located near the town of Idaho Springs, CO, if you are ever in the area and looking for an easy, 1-2 hour hike with amazing views of the surrounding mountains of Denver. 

I kept seeing all of these "red berries" on the trees around us as we hiked to the top. I finally stopped Dylan to get a closer look at the "berries" and discovered they are small burgundy colored Pine Cones... who knew??!! I thought they were beautiful and had to take a picture. 

Dylan always climbs first... always. I have a horrible sense of direction and require him to be in the lead, so I do not get lost. He also seems to find the better paths and places for my feet and hands to go when we climb the boulders. Not quite sure why he likes to take pictures of my awkwardness as I ascend these mountains, but he does... 

Yahoo!! We made it to the top and had great views!!! We could see Long's Peak (which Dylan did last year- it is supposed to be one of the hardest 14teeners to accomplish in CO), Pike's Peak (America's Mountain), and Mount Evans, our goal for Saturday. The weather was nice.. not too chilly on the top. I only had on a T-shirt and a Northface layer that day. The color the clouds give the mountains is so pretty and if you stay in one spot for a few minutes, the clouds shift and change the color and shape of the mountains. Dylan and I hung out on the top, chatting with these seasoned climbers who offered advice for Evans and just enjoyed chatting with other people who liked to climb mountains. 

Chief is the mountain in the background. We always like to take pics as we are ascending, when they look so much higher and scarier than the mountain actually is, and when we are on the road going away from the mountain. The view from the road always feels me with great satisfaction, pride and a kick-ass attitude that Dylan and I made it to the top of that thing and lived to tell the tale!! 

Towards the end of the road is the turn-off for Mount Evans and a national park/camping area around this lake, Echo Lake. Dylan and I had lunch here, listening to the waves roll into shore and took one of the short scenic trails around the water's edge to the other side of the lake. As you can see, it was getting on in the afternoon and the clouds/rain were moving into the mountain area. ALWAYS, ALWAYS have to be off the mountain and back in the car by 1... 2 pm at the latest!!! Otherwise, YOU WILL GET WET! 

This area is not known for waterfalls, but I saw this as we were traveling back into town and thought it was so pretty and serene! I was also pleasantly surprised to find a small waterfall! After having traveled the Hana Road in Maui, viewing their gorgeous, lush waterfalls and traveled the Columbia Gorge, viewing their huge, staggering waterfalls, I am into waterfalls. The sheer power of the water just amazes me! 

"The point is... when I see a sunset or waterfall or something, for a split second it's so great because I'm a little bit out of my brain and it's got nothing to do with me. I"m not trying to figure it out, ya know what I mean? And I wonder if I can somehow find a way to maintain that mind stillness..." -Chris Evans-

Yah, I'm that girl....

So.... I might be a TAD OBSESSED with the care and preparation for Goobz when Dylan and I go away on vacation. These are the instructions and items needed for my student to watch Goobz while we are away. And this is only for 4 or 5 days!!! Can you imagine how it will be when we go to Europe for 12??!! 

Now, she already knows where everything is. She already came over to the house... met Goobz... got the layout of everything, etc.

She even took notes on her phone while I talked!! (Do I train my kiddos well or what?! Hehehehehehe!!!) BUT.... I still feel compelled to do all of this. 

Are the sticky notes too over the top?? Erm... probably. But, never forget the power of the sticky note for the teacher!!! Even during the summer I cannot get away from them. 

It is just so very hard to leave my little guy!!! Part of me is like YES! Freedom!! I don't have to worry about walks, bathroom business, play time, how long Dylan and I can be out, etc. And then the other HUGE part of me panics at the thought of NOT BEING WITH MY LITTLE GUY!!! 

How does he know we are coming back? Who will he snuggle with for naps and bedtime? Will he get the right kind of playtime? Will he eat enough? Will he be mad at me when we come back.... he generally is. What if he gets off the leash and gets lost? OMG.... the horrible thoughts are just everywhere! 

Must. Stop. Negative. Thoughts. 

I have already cried once today about leaving him. I should probably wait until we are on the plane tomorrow before I have another spell... otherwise, Dylan might hurt me. 

So... as I go to love on my precious Goobz and snuggle in bed, I leave you with this thought: 

Can you only imagine how I will be with real, human being children???!!! 

Tear Jerker: Tissues Required....

"When your mother says she's Fat"

By Kasey Edwards

June 23, 2013

7.3K

Originally appeared on The Daily Life. Republished here with permission.

Dear Mom,
I was 7 when I discovered that you were fat, ugly, and horrible. Up until that point I had believed that you were beautiful—in every sense of the word. I remember flicking through old photo albums and staring at pictures of you standing on the deck of a boat. Your white strapless bathing suit looked so glamorous, just like a movie star. Whenever I had the chance I’d pull out that wondrous white bathing suit hidden in your bottom drawer and imagine a time when I’d be big enough to wear it; when I’d be like you.
But all of that changed when, one night, we were dressed up for a party and you said to me, ‘‘Look at you, so thin, beautiful, and lovely. And look at me, fat, ugly, and horrible.’’
At first I didn’t understand what you meant.

‘‘You’re not fat,’’ I said earnestly and innocently, and you replied, ‘‘Yes I am, darling. I’ve always been fat; even as a child.’’
In the days that followed I had some painful revelations that have shaped my whole life. I learned that:
1. You must be fat because mothers don’t lie.
2. Fat is ugly and horrible.
3. When I grow up I’ll look like you and therefore I will be fat, ugly, and horrible too.

Years later, I looked back on this conversation and the hundreds that followed and cursed you for feeling so unattractive, insecure, and unworthy. Because, as my first and most influential role model, you taught me to believe the same thing about myself.
With every grimace at your reflection in the mirror, every new wonder diet that was going to change your life, and every guilty spoon of ‘‘Oh-I-really-shouldn’t,’’ I learned that women must be thin to be valid and worthy. Girls must go without because their greatest contribution to the world is their physical beauty.
Just like you, I have spent my whole life feeling fat. When did fat become a feeling anyway? And because I believed I was fat, I knew I was no good.
But now that I am older, and a mother myself, I know that blaming you for my body hatred is unhelpful and unfair. I now understand that you too are a product of a long and rich lineage of women who were taught to loathe themselves.

Look at the example Nanna set for you. Despite being what could only be described as famine-victim chic, she dieted every day of her life until the day she died at 79 years of age. She used to put on makeup to walk to the mailbox for fear that somebody might see her unpainted face.
I remember her ‘‘compassionate’’ response when you announced that Dad had left you for another woman. Her first comment was, ‘‘I don’t understand why he’d leave you. You look after yourself, you wear lipstick. You’re overweight, but not that much.’’
Before Dad left, he provided no balm for your body-image torment either.
‘‘Jesus, Jan,’’ I overheard him say to you. ‘‘It’s not that hard. Energy in versus energy out. If you want to lose weight you just have to eat less.’’
That night at dinner I watched you implement Dad’s ‘‘Energy In, Energy Out: Jesus, Jan, Just Eat Less’’ weight-loss cure. You served up chow mein for dinner. Everyone else’s food was on a dinner plate except yours. You served your chow mein on a tiny bread-and-butter plate.
As you sat in front of that pathetic scoop of mince, silent tears streamed down your face. I said nothing. Not even when your shoulders started heaving from your distress. We all ate our dinner in silence. Nobody comforted you. Nobody told you to stop being ridiculous and get a proper plate. Nobody told you that you were already loved and already good enough. Your achievements and your worth—as a teacher of children with special needs and a devoted mother of three of your own—paled into insignificance when compared with the centimeters you couldn’t lose from your waist.

It broke my heart to witness your despair and I’m sorry that I didn’t rush to your defense. I’d already learned that it was your fault that you were fat. I’d even heard Dad describe losing weight as a ‘‘simple’’ process—yet one that you still couldn’t come to grips with. The lesson: You didn’t deserve any food and you certainly didn’t deserve any sympathy.
But I was wrong, Mom. Now I understand what it’s like to grow up in a society that tells women that their beauty matters most, and at the same time defines a standard of beauty that is perpetually out of our reach. I also know the pain of internalizing these messages. We have become our own jailors and we inflict our own punishments for failing to measure up. No one is more cruel to us than we are to ourselves.
But this madness has to stop, Mom. It stops with you, it stops with me, and it stops now. We deserve better—better than to have our days brought to ruin by bad body thoughts, wishing we were otherwise.

And it’s not just about you and me anymore. It’s also about Violet. Your granddaughter is only 3 and I do not want body hatred to take root inside her and strangle her happiness, her confidence, and her potential. I don’t want Violet to believe that her beauty is her most important asset; that it will define her worth in the world. When Violet looks to us to learn how to be a woman, we need to be the best role models we can be. We need to show her with our words and our actions that women are good enough just the way they are. And for her to believe us, we need to believe it ourselves.

The older we get, the more loved ones we lose to accidents and illness. Their passing is always tragic and far too soon. I sometimes think about what these friends—and the people who love them—wouldn’t give for more time in a body that was healthy. A body that would allow them to live just a little longer. The size of that body’s thighs or the lines on its face wouldn’t matter. It would be alive and therefore it would be perfect.
Your body is perfect too. It allows you to disarm a room with your smile and infect everyone with your laugh. It gives you arms to wrap around Violet and squeeze her until she giggles. Every moment we spend worrying about our physical ‘‘flaws’’ is a moment wasted, a precious slice of life that we will never get back.
Let us honor and respect our bodies for what they do instead of despising them for how they appear. Focus on living healthy and active lives, let our weight fall where it may, and consign our body hatred in the past where it belongs. When I looked at that photo of you in the white bathing suit all those years ago, my innocent young eyes saw the truth. I saw unconditional love, beauty, and wisdom. I saw my Mom.
Love, Kasey xx

Kasey Edwards is a writer based in Australia and author of 30-Something And Over It. You can follow her on Twitter here.

"King of Pop" Playlist

Another workout down... another amazing playlist to get you going! Michael Jackson was beyond good; he just was. Maybe he was a really weird guy in his personal life... maybe he looked kind of strange and forget where he came from (roots- hehe!)... maybe there were lots of other issues we will never know about but at the end of the day, the man could make music ya'll!!!

1. Shake your Body (Down to the Ground)- easing into the workout... starting to feel the rhythm... gearing up your mind for that next hour of sweat

2. They Don't Care about Us- slow steady reps of arms or legs.. blood is flowing... heart is pumping... and you are starting to feel the muscles burn

3. Jam- uppin' the tempo... gettin' a little forceful on the lyrics which makes you want the workout more...

4. Bad- now you are in it! The beat is up for a while and you are thinkin' about how badass you are gonna look once you finish... strong muscles, lean body, glistenin skin... "Giving you to the count of 3! Show your stuff...I'M BAD!"

5. Beat It- that's right, BEAT IT! Beat the cookies, the carbs, the job, the boss, the annoying kid in the 2nd row.. hehe! Whatever the heck it is that day... "Just Beat It!" 

6. Billie Jean- back to those reps with a faster tempo, less weight (one of my alltime fav songs!!) "She told me her name was Billie Jean and she caused scene!" 

7. Smooth Criminal- back up to that fast tempo... get another sweaty 4 minutes under your belt "Are you okay?" Yes you are!! You may not feel okay as you are shakin and sweatin and wishing you were somewhere else, but trust me, you are more than okay! 

8. Wanna be Startin' Something- middle of the workout... don't be a vegetable... 

9. Don't Stop till You Get Enough- oh i love this song!! always makes me think of Rush Hour 2 with Chris Tucker singing this in a Chinese gansta bar... hahahahahahaha! I can't help but laugh at this scene and press on!! 

10. Black or White- "Eat this!" Love when the kid says that line in the voice over!! That's what you tell the machine, the weights, the run, the bike, whatever!! Just tell that workout to "Eat this!" 

11. The Way You Make Me Feel- getting to the end... feeling every muscle in your body... "Oooh! Come on girl!" 

12. Thriller- last one before the cool down... perhaps you just need to do the Thriller dance "No one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike... fight for your life!" 

13. Free Willy Theme "Will You Be There- cool down "Everyone takin control of me. Seems like the world's got a role for me. I'm so confused will you show me? Will you show me and care enough to hold me?" 

14. Man in the Mirror- cool down 

"Gonna make a change, for once in my life. It's gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference, gonna make it right...If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and just make that change! " 

"In the Summertime, when the weather is high..."

"You can stretch right up and touch the sky! When the weather's fine... have a drive! Go out and see what you can find... Just do what you feel. Do a turn or return the twenty-five... You can make it good, make it good and really fine. When the weather's fine, we go (hiking) or go swimming... We're always happy! Life's for living, yeah that's our philosophy. In the Summertime, when the weather is high, you can stretch right up and touch the sky.... "

Borrowing from good ole Mungo Jerry there- such a fun song and so true! It is Summertime and life is grand! We are so blessed right now because the temps are still in the lows 90s and it is the middle of June!! That is just unheard of for South Texas!! Therefore, Team Carey is taking advantage of the nice, summer weather and continuing to explore the great outdoors of the Hill Country. 

Team Carey spent the past Sunday exploring Pedernales Falls State Park near Johnson City, TX (on the way to Austin).  Everything was lush and green for the middle of June because we have been getting so much rain lately. The park is known for it's small waterfalls. Now, please don't laugh! The Falls are small, but at least we have some down in South TX!!! :) Nothing to compare with.. say, Multnomah Falls in Oregon (Dylan and I spent a summer up in the Northwest a few years ago, viewing Oregon, Washington State and British Columbia. You should go! Beyond gorgeous up there!! The hike to Multnomah Falls is way worth it btw!), but we love them anyways! 

Goobz is such a hiker and a trooper!! I love how happy he is in the above pic! Big ole puppy dog smile on his face, the wind blowing his ears back.. AH! Life is grand! He is also getting so much better about the water!! Can you believe he is swimming?!! Now, most every other dog we run into just loves the water- my dog, not so much. He has been terrified of it ever since we rescued him. He is slowly, slowly getting better at learning how to enjoy the water. Dylan and I think because it is hot, we have an advantage. Goobz wants to cool off and the water is cool. This last time, he did not have any trouble jumping into the shallow end of the river area and splashing around. Now, deep water and swimming out towards Dylan does not happen, no matter how much we try. But... baby steps right?! 

 

Carey Family pic... using the self-timer on the camera... typical child, Goobz refused to look at the camera. 

Pit Stop: Both my boys require lots of water and fuel to hike all day. 

At the end of the day, even I had to get all the way in the water. Goobz ended up sitting on top of me... go figure! Dylan takes off down the river, explores the banks, splashes around and Goobz stays with mommy :) 

Did you know Dairy Queen stores now serve Orange Julius???!!! I know right! That yummy, creamy goodness you can only get at the mall or random carnival places is now in the DQs... or at least in our neck of the woods. We passed one on the way home and just had to stop. Goobz passed out in the back seat... Orange creamy goodness for Dylan and I.... 5 or 6 miles under our belts.... playing in the river... 

The Lady and her Monsters...

Mary Shelley's Frankenstein is one of my all-time favorite classic novels and ironically, none of my English teachers ever had us read this book. (Thank goodness the education system of TX has rectified that; my sophomore students read this novel. Most of them don't get it or think it is dumb. Most of them also get bummed when they realize it isn't scary in the way they imagine the story to be. A select few will understand the plot line and the behind the scenes story once we talk about the Industrial Revolution and advances in medicine and science in my class, but most will half-ass the book like they do everything else and move on with their lives. Ah well.... at least they are reading it.)

I find it strange because I had to read Crime and Punishment by crazy Dostoyevsky (which is another of my favorite classics!), but not Frankenstein. Anywho, I ended up reading this one day by myself during college and just fell in love with it! I was incredibly surprised as to "who" exactly the monster was, mostly because what you see on TV or in theaters does NOT portray the characters accurately. I was impressed too, at the themes with which a young girl back in the early 1800s choose to address. 

So I found this book in the library this past weekend called The Lady and her Monsters: A Tale of Dissections, real life Dr. Frankenstein's and the Creation of Mary Shelley's Masterpiece by Roseanne Montillo. I picked it up and found it fascinating!! It is non-fiction, and basically goes behind the scenes of Shelley's book, explaining in great detail the scientific, medical, philosophical and social ideas of the 1600s-1800s in Europe. Here are a few things I learned...

1. Medicine was down-right scary before the invention of penicillin in the early 1920s!!! 

2. Most of the time, the local Dr. was also the local Vet. Even more often, the man was more familiar with animals than he was humans; therefore, he treated humans the same way he did animals, assuming our bodies were built and functioned the same way. Ah.... that is a huge no! Animals and humans are similar but NOT identical. Can you imagine being a woman giving birth and having the Dr. come to see you with his hands dirty from animal waste and germs? And! He wants to put his hands all around or in your personal, private parts?? God forbid your baby is having trouble coming out or needs to be turned!!! No wonder soo many women died from childbirth! Yah, it is a difficult process (or so I'm told), but most of the time, it should not be that life-threatening. However, when a dude sticks his nasty human and animal germs actually into your bodily fluids, you bet you are going to get a fever and some other awful disease or bleeding you cannot control!! According to the book, over half of the women never even sent for the Dr and if you have to call for one, death was imminent . They preferred female friends or midwives which naturally caused resentment by the Dr. who could not believe a woman was more informed than him on any kind of medical practice. Hence, the idea that women who were midwives or skilled in herbs and medicine were witches or had power from the Devil. Stupid, but understandable when the population does not understand medicine, theory of germs,or give credence to the intelligence of women.

3. Frankenstein is the name of an actual family in southern Germany (Bavaria), starting around the 1300s. The Frankenstein family ironically had a major feud with the Dracula family of Transylvania (Vlad the Impaler aka Count Dracula). 

Frankenstein Family Castle

4. One of the most famous men of the Frankenstein family was St. George.... St. George Frankenstein, who became legend when he supposedly slayed a huge dragon to rescue a princess. In the original legend, St. George does not survive because he is pierced by the tail of a dragon, but he does rescue the princess and save the land. Today, St. George lives most of the time.. hehe! 

5. Mary Shelley spent a week touring the area around the Frankenstein family of Germany, listening to their folklore, legends and marveling at the beauty of Bavaria. Her and her husband, Percy Shelley, then traveled to Switzerland. Most of the novel takes place in these two countries. She wrote the book almost immediately after returning to England from their trip. 

6. The power of electricity was enormously popular to Europe and the USA during this time period. It was actually called "Galvanization" back then, because of the man who was able to attach electrical currents to dead bodies, both animal and human, and cause them to "come back to life" from the electrical charge that stimulated the nervous system. 

7. Almost 95% of the time, criminals were used as cadavers for the anatomy schools being created. Criminals greatly feared their body being used for dissection because they knew the body would be cut into pieces and not properly buried. Dismembered bodies that were not buried would not be granted entrance into Heaven and their soul would be forced to wander the Earth: very common religious and pagan belief during this time period. 

8. Another scary thought: almost 50% of the criminal bodies were NOT actually dead after the hangings. Hangings were the most common form of death during this time period, with torture often accompanying the criminal before hand. The criminal would wake up when the a

natomist sliced open their stomach on the dissection table- OUCH!! After that, two things could happen. 1. The cuts were so deep the criminal would bleed to death on the table and the dissection could continue. 2. The anatomist sewed the criminal back up, took him back to the scaffold, had the man hung again and then started the dissection. Either way, OUCH! 

9. The hangings were public spectacles, greatly enjoyed by the townspeople... all of the townspeople. Social status did not factor into this, other than to determine how close you could be to the execution. Most of the time dissections were public as well. Medical students had first dibs, but other prominent men of the towns were allowed to and often wanted to observe.

 "To examine the cause of life, we must have recourse to Death." 
-Mary Shelley, Frankenstein-

10. Mt. Tambora erupted in 1815, killing thousands of inhabitants in the Indonesian islands. The ash and dust cloud would carry into China, causing many deaths of animals, rice fields. It also brought an excess of rain and diseases from the huge amount of standing, putrid water. Europe saw the  effects of the eruption in 1816. Italy saw yellow-tinted "snow" fall during the summer. The summer and fall potato crop in Ireland died. Wheat and corn in both Germany and France also died that year. Even North America was affected because they saw frost covering the ground all the way into June that year. 1816 is called the "Year without a Summer." Shelley witnessed and heard of these events, many of which play into her novel. 

11. Shelley had many mental and physical demons, as did her poet husband, Percy Shelley. They both suffered from what many today would call Manic Depression and Bipolar Disorders. Percy Shelley was always being compared to other poets, such as Lord Byron, never receiving the acclaim he believed he deserved. Mary Shelley fought the stigma of being female, as her mother, famous women's rights activist of the 1700s Mary Wollstonecraft, did. Mary suffered from miscarriages. She also watched her husband have an affair with her closest friend. As a child, her father encouraged her schooling and higher education; once she fell for Shelley, he cut her off from everything. Her book had to be published anonymously in the beginning, with everyone thinking a man wrote it. When the truth came out, she was ridiculed. She died alone, with little to show for her life at the time. 

Percy, Shelley, Byron

"He who fights with monsters must take care, lest he become a monster. And if you gaze for long enough into the abyss; the abyss gazes also into you."
-Nietzsche- 

Summer lovin' had me a blast!

Goobz and Dylan atop Enchanted Rock Dome, Fredericksburg, TX

Goobz finally realizing water is not a bad thing- it makes you cool!! Way to go froggie-style buddy!! 

I came home from Marshall graduation the other night to find Goobz hard core dominating my husband... 

Dylan climbing out at Enchanted Rock... 

We brought our fabulous friend Andrew Knudson and his equally awesome girl Lauren out to climb with us this past trip... 

Both Andrew and Lauren did awesome! Way to go guys!!!